All of us can benefit from introspection, especially at a level that questions truth in our thoughts, words and actions.
"When I am finishing a picture, I hold some G-d-made object up to it— a rock, a flower, the branch of a tree or my hand—as a final test. If the painting stands up beside a thing man cannot make, the painting is authentic. If there's a clash between the two, it's bad art." —Marc Chagall
David, a 19th century follower of Chasidic philosophy had waited patiently for more than a year for a private audience with the great Chassidic master, Rabbi Dovber Schneuri of Lubavitch. The accumulated thoughts and the build-up of emotions were suddenly awakened within him as the fateful day approached. He thought about the opportunity to pour out his soul to this legend of a holy man.
Ever since he received the notice with the date and time that the Rebbe would be able to see him, David had been a nonstop path of deep introspection. He was hoping to use the precious one-on-one time with this great spiritual guide in a way that would have an everlasting positive impact on his life.
Upon entering the room, he had none of the anticipated awe of being in the presence of such light. Instead, the Rebbe's eyes seemed to open David's heart, and David felt a tug at his very essence.
"Rebbe, I have come to the sad realization that all the good that I do in my life, I only do to serve a superficial agenda of personal vanity," David said. "I want people to like me, so I do nice things. I want people to think I am sincere, so I act a certain way before them. But deep inside, I know that it is all about me!"
He continued, "I have come to seek your guidance, please Rebbe, help me. I want to be more authentic in my ways. I desire that all my thoughts, deeds and actions should not be done with the intent just to impress others, but to be true and pure from within."
The Rebbe's non-response tugged deeper into David's heart.
David continued, "Even the fact that I have bared my internal truth before you, this in itself that I have spoken is also just to impress you! I can't even be authentic in my pursuit of authenticity!"
And, as David continued pouring out his heart and thoughts, the Rebbe sat in silence.
"Even what I have just said," David found himself asking rhetorically, "Is it possible that this too is another possible way just to get attention?"
The Rebbe sat in silence, allowing David to discover internal truth on his own. David was overcome with emotion, and he simply fainted!
It was after David awoke that the Rebbe finally spoke.
"Now, David," the Rebbe said, "That was authentic."
All of us can benefit from introspection, especially at a level that questions truth in our thoughts, words and actions. Such introspection, while often painful and humbling, can produce internal growth as the foundation for a new beginning.
This coming Wednesday night will mark the beginning of Rosh Hashanah, the days that the Jewish faith celebrates our very first beginning, the creation of man and the purpose of our existence. Rosh Hashanah gives each person the opportunity for a new beginning. We are reminded of the importance of being simultaneously humble and authentic.
Rosh Hashanah is filled with many exciting opportunities for new beginnings. The sounding of the shofar is a unique time to meditate on the deepest part of self. What does this mean? The idea of "self" actually transcends the very barriers that otherwise keep us from our true essence.
In our vulnerability, consider this: "The light of the eyes makes the heart happy." (Proverbs 15:30)
At the deepest level of introspection, we are no longer limited to the ideas and thoughts of our past. Rather, we only look ahead to begin a new journey. Such light brings the inevitable relief from doubt. When that happens, can there be any outcome other than true joy and unadulterated happiness?
If you would like to participate in the annual shofar experience, I welcome you to join me and our Chabad community for the sounding of the shofar at our "no tickets/no charge" High Holiday services. We just want to know that you will be there. Please let me know that you are coming by making a reservation at www.jewishmalibu.com
With best wishes to you and yours for a happy and healthy sweet New Year!
As always, I welcome your thoughts and comments below or at [email protected]